Adultery at Mayo Lake Campsite

This post is rated PG-13 for mature and scandalous content portraying the true story of an illicit country romance.

Dalton and I decided to go camping one weekend in mid-September, one of the only possible pandemic friendly weekend getaway options. About an hour north of Chapel Hill there’s a park called Mayo Lake Park which has a lake (go figure), a campsite, and a disc golf course.

Recently we’ve been getting into disc golf. I highly recommend it if you’re looking for a new quarantine hobby, even though I suck at it. It would really help if I had any amount of hand eye coordination.

Anyways, I was super excited to go camping for only my second time ever. Bugs! Chilly nights! Strangers sleeping next to me! What could be better?

Luckily, when we arrived in the middle of nowhere, the park ranger told us that we were the only ones at the campsite that night. At least I could cross sleeping next to strangers off of my list of concerns.

Or so I thought.

Around 7:30 pm it was starting to get dark and we had our fire going, getting ready to roast some weenies. All was well. We had the tent set up and air mattress pumped up (yes, of course I was glamping), and the fire was a roarin’.

At dusk, a car pulled into the campsite gravel road.

A 6 foot some, large, very “country-looking” man got out of the car. Alone. He looked around, sizing up the tent sites. Of all 20-some tent sites on the property guess which one he chose.

The tent site right next to ours. Of course.

Dalton and I were pretty weirded out and a little suspicious, so being the friendly Wisconsinite he is, Dalton asked the guy, “Looking for campsite?”

And he said, “Yup.”

Not much of a talker I guess.

This man fished out his tent, constructing it in the dark. He started to look around for some firewood when another car pulled up. A woman got out of the car and my first thought was:

THANK GOD WE’RE NOT GETTING MURDERED TONIGHT

She got out of the car and walked up to the man saying, “Sorry, I was on the phone with my mother-in-law.”

…

Mother-in-law…

Dalton and I looked at each other with wide eyes, piecing together that her mother-in-law is in fact, not this man’s mother.

Now at least we weren’t worried about sleeping next to an axe murderer, and we joked that maybe they’re having an affair! Ha ha, very funny. Who comes to a $10 campsite to have an affair?

Of course we had to eavesdrop on their conversations whether we liked it or not since they picked the campsite 20 feet away from ours. You’d think if they were cheaters they’d want to be discreet.

All cuddled up next to each around their fire made out of damp wood, we heard the lady say, “I appreciate everything he does as a father but…”

OH MY GOD SCAN-DAL-OUS

At this point, there was no doubt that these two country folk were having an affair.

As if that wasn’t enough evidence, they both went to the bathroom. For 40 minutes. In the same bathroom. I wonder what they could have possibly been doing in there!

Only I didn’t have to wonder.

Because when I came back from the bathroom 20 minutes later, the country couple had gone into their tent. Unfortunately, they had left their flashlight on, illuminating the tent and their shadows. AND they had unzipped the window to their tent, which happened to exactly face our campsite.

We got quite the show, complete with sound effects.

Just when I thought the night couldn’t get any weirder, we hunkered down to go to sleep around 11:30. Dalton sleeps like a rock and immediately fell asleep. But I was kept awake.

Crunch, crunch, crunch. Snap. See saw, see saw.

The large man shuffled around the campsite, looking for ways to keep his fire going. He snapped sticks in half, sawed chunks off of logs, and waved his flashlight to face our tent.

He did this for the next TWO AND A HALF HOURS.

I had finally fallen asleep a little before 2 am, when I was awoken suddenly by a car screeching down the gravel road.

Honk, honk!!!!!!! The new car went, pulling up right next to us and our new unfaithful friends.

Dalton grabbed the miniature axe inside of the tent, ready to defend our territory, when we saw the park ranger’s flashing lights coming towards us. Two male voices conversed for a couple of minutes, and then the new car left.

In the morning, the woman’s car was gone. The man silently packed up his tent all by himself and went on his way.

So who was in the car that came blazing down the road at 2:00 am?

We will never really know, but we can only imagine that it must have been the cheater’s jealous, angry husband.